Healing Hollywood: Do You Know What Your Success Feels Like?
No matter what your age and experience, when you work in Hollywood, success often feels just out of reach. Piecing together success means hustling for jobs by keeping in contact with people, showing up to work and building a reputation that makes people trust you. However, doing this can turn into an exhausting grind, leaving you feeling burned out and disconnected from your dreams with the goal always being moved a bit further away than you originally thought it would be. What if we took a step back and asked ourselves: Do we know what our specific success feels like? Spoiler alert: it’s not always about the house, the car, the awards or the show and that is why I am asking the question.
Remembering the Dream
Before the long endless hours on set or in the office and the grind of “getting ahead,” what was your dream? Was it to win an Oscar, see your name in lights, or maybe just to create something meaningful? It’s easy to lose sight of that beginning dream amidst the chaos of the industry. We go from dreaming to do the thing we love, to doing the thing we love until we don’t love it anymore.
Think about the last time you daydreamed about your Hollywood journey. Maybe you envisioned yourself working with the titans of your craft, only to end up on a reality show in Jersey. Thinking that you would settle in Santa Monica or Studio City and work a couple of jobs every year so that you had down time…but now you are fighting for jobs throughout the year just to financially survive and keep your health insurance. When the expectation of your career and the reality of your career are at odds, it keeps you from navigating your career wisely.
Reconnect with that initial passion. Remind yourself what brought you here in the first place. Was it the art of storytelling, the thrill of performance, or the chance to impact lives? Whatever it was, let it fuel your fire again. After all, you didn’t move to Hollywood just to punch a clock.
Crafting Your Ideal Life
Now that you’ve revisited your dream, do you know what the energy of your life is? In other words, how do you want to live your life? This isn’t just about your career—it’s about your entire existence. How many times have read self help books that ask you what your perfect day looks like? Has it changed? Are you sipping coffee on a sun-soaked patio, surrounded by friends in your perfect day while in reality you are trapped in a windowless office trying to hunt down sound editing space on a Sunday and calling in favors for a low rate?
Success means different things to different people. You may have thought success would be going out to fabulous dinners with your fabulous friends, a fancy Audi in the driveway and a home that could land you in Los Angeles Magazine.
Some might equate success to living in a ginormous house in the hills with a Bently parked out front. But let’s be real: is a sprawling estate really what you want, or is it just the Hollywood fantasy we’ve all been sold?
You deserve a life that resonates with your true self. So, ask yourself: What makes you feel fulfilled? Maybe it’s a cozy apartment filled with plants, a reliable car that doesn’t need constant repairs, and spontaneous dinner parties with friends. The Hollywood dream can be redefined—it just requires a little introspection.
The Feelings Behind Success
Knowing what you want to feel will help you define your success goal. Do you want security, joy, recognition, or maybe all three? Many of us chase the shiny trophies, believing they’ll grant us that elusive feeling of “making it.” But what if we focused on what would truly fulfill us?
Take a moment to reflect on this: What makes you feel like you’ve truly made it in Hollywood? Is it getting a nod from the critics, a job with a top director, or perhaps it’s simply having enough free time to pursue your passion projects without burning out?
For some, it might be about hitting the right networking events and having the right people in your social circle. For others, it could just be that feeling of pride when you create something you believe in. Remember, feelings matter. It’s not just about the milestones; it’s about the journey and how it makes you feel along the way.
And yes, there is that moment when your college friends hear through the grapevine about what you do for a living and they are a bit jealous – however – Hollywood is too much of a freaking crazy ass show to do it to make your friends jealous. It’s not worth it.
Understanding Your Career Energy
Speaking of feelings, what is the energy of your career? Think about it: Does your work drain you, or does it energize you? The industry is notoriously chaotic, but that doesn’t mean your career has to be.
Let’s reflect on your lifestyle. What house do you live in? What car do you drive? What are your social engagements like? Take a moment to assess whether these aspects align with your true self or are you merely keeping up with the Hollywood Joneses.
If your life feels more like a race than a fulfilling journey, it’s time for a change. You’re not just a cog in the machine; you’re a human being with dreams and desires. Embrace what makes you feel alive and release what doesn’t serve you. Craft a life you fucking love.
Embracing Career Evolution
As you navigate your career, it’s essential to embrace the concept of evolution. Every project you take on is an opportunity to grow. It’s not only about the paycheck; it’s about what you’re learning and how you’re evolving as an artist and as a person.
Think of it this way: each project is like a new chapter in your story. Some will be bestsellers; others might be destined for the bargain bin. Either way, you’re growing with every experience. Don’t just chase after the cash—consider the impact of each opportunity on your personal journey.
And let’s be honest: growth doesn’t always mean jumping off a cliff. Sometimes, it’s just a step sideways. Embrace the idea that your career is a path, not a race.
Conclusion
Success in Hollywood can come with a lot of pain as well as excitement and it’s vital to redefine what success means for you personally.
Take a moment to reflect on your journey. What does success feel like for you? Remember, it’s not just about the milestones; it’s about how you feel along the way. Embrace the journey, nurture your passions, and most importantly, keep that dream alive. After all, you didn’t move to Hollywood just to punch a clock—you moved to create a life worth living!